I went shopping on Saturday for the first time in ages. It was a very productive trip. I finally found the leopard print shirt I’ve been looking for since my Saturday Fashion Challenge months ago. (Anyone else ever challenge themselves like that?) I also found an amazing pair of jeans at LOFT that make me look two sizes smaller. Overall I was happy with this shopping trip despite learning one thing: I’m now a size 12 for the first time in almost six years.
A few weeks ago I wrote about #operationskinny. I even took pictures of the healthy food that I was eating. I got loads of encouragement and a lot of people showing support. What I haven’t shared with on my blog is that #operationskinny ended several weeks ago. You can say it ended faster than it began. Was it out of laziness? No. For once I can say that it was not due to my procrastination or excuses. I even bought myself a new knee brace so that I could continue exercise. But, after a week, the pain came back with a vengeance and I had to stop exercising.
I don’t know what made me think that my knee would heal on its own. In my office visit a week ago, the doctor did a physical exam and assessed the condition of my knee. He said my knee will never heal on its own, and he was pretty sure that I tore my medial meniscus. That explains my knee pain. Tomorrow I get a knee MRI. We won’t know how bad the tear actually is until after the results. No matter how extensive the tear is in my knee, I will need surgery to correct the problem. Needless to say, until I find out how bad this is and until I recover from surgery, operation skinny is postponed until further notice.
Is a size 12 the end of the world? Obviously not. I try not to gripe about the number, as I know plenty of other women struggle with weight. A size 12 doesn’t define who I am, but when I used to be able to shop in the same store and walk out with size 6 clothing, it’s a blow to my ego.
For the past year I have been living in mostly T-shirts and yoga pants. The worst thing about this is that it’s a rut. Yoga pants expand with you, and if you’re not careful, you could end up busting out of them before you restock your wine supply.
I guess all I’m trying to say is that I’m finally getting things taken care of. I don’t know when I’ll be scheduled for surgery, nor do I know how much longer it will take me to recover to begin exercising again. I hope sooner rather than later, because I need to be college hot again before I get knocked up. And that’s the gospel truth.
Mal says
Hi Lisette, I’m a new reader here.
Size 12 is not the end of the world indeed. I’m size 16 today and I used to really really hate my body. I gained a lot of weight the past 5 years and it’s hard to lose them. I learn to live with those extra pounds and hopefully can find pretty plus size clothes. I wish I was size 12 again lol. Good luck on your surgery and exercising again.
Thanks for this post!
Lisette says
Hi Mal. Thank you for your kind words!
It’s definitely hard losing weight, but hopefully after I get this procedure done I can lead an active lifestyle again!
Breenah says
Also remember that number sizing is so weird anyway. I just bought two dresses, same brand, two different sizes. That skirt looks perfect, btw.
Lisette says
You are so right, Breenah! The shirt is amazing! It’s even tailored through the waist to define curves. Worth every penny!
Rachel says
I am a 11-13. I have noticed since I hit my mid twenties my body has changed. I have not gotten “big”..just..my body is changing. I would love ot be a 7 again but I will never see that unless I starve my self. I love the way I look now. I think you look amazing lady!!! Never let anyone tell you differently!
Lisette says
Thanks Rachel!
Also, where are you shopping? I thought odd numbers were for juniors and even numbers for women
Rachel says
I shop alot at Maurices and they make you feel smaller. I can downsize a lot there and they have the cutest clothes there!
Kristyn says
Oh girl….you and I are in the same boat. I was doing so well watching what I was eating and counting points (WW) but now I have just stopped completely. I haven’t gained everything back and hope to not…but I don’t really count like I used to. It’s bad. And I need to exercise before my wedding. Ugh! What if that dress I ordered doesn’t fit when it comes in? Yea….that’s a scary thought!
Lisette says
Eek! My wedding dress was snug when I got it…and that was after losing 5lbs due to illness. Definitely get moving! You don’t want to let out your gown after waiting for it for so long! Good luck!
Madi says
I’m sending all my positive energy to you, hoping for a minor problem that can be fixed quickly and has little down time. :) #operationskinny can still go on even if you can’t exercise with your lower body! Just remember, we love you JUST the way you are. :) *hugs*
Lisette says
Thanks Madi! Yes, I just spoke with someone who had the very same injury as I did. They were able to walk (without pain!) the very next day. I can’t wait!
Sarah says
Hey girl! I just wanted to reach out and say that I used to work on a orthotics surgical floor at a hospital and my mom has been through two knee surgeries. One for a torn ACL and one for a replacement but both were positive experiences. Even being on my surgical floor, I always see the persons with high, happy energy always get to go home early and recover faster just because they’re determined to and have the right attitude! I know how disappointed you must feel that you can’t work out but it will get better, I promise. My mom still plays tennis on a league and exercises regularly. I hope this makes you feel a little better and helps keeps your spirits up! And no matter what size, you’ll look fierce in those new clothes!
Lisette says
First of all…you are a ROCKSTAR with compliments! Thank you so very much!
I’m so glad to hear that about your prior patients and your mother! I cannot wait for this surgery date to be set so I can dance, walk/jog as exercise, and walk my dogs every day. Poor things haven’t gotten the exercise they’ve needed either.
I will keep you updated! xoxo
Amanda says
Ha! That last sentence made me literally snort. I am hovering between a size 12/14 and feeling the same way. I used to be a 6 a few years ago. *sigh* I don’t have an injury for an excuse though. There is nothing to stop me from getting those tennis shoes on. But I really need to get my rear in gear because I have a lot of weight to lose before I attempt another pregnancy!
Lisette says
Haha. AP from I Love You More Than Carrots coined that term, so I can’t take credit for it! :)
Kristine says
Don’t you be too hard on yourself! Beautiful comes in all shapes and sizes and that number on the tag only means so much! Wishing you lots of luck with your MRI and it’s results. I know knee pain puts a stop to most exercises, it had me almost completely out of commission earlier this summer… but where there’s a will there is a way!!
Lisette says
Aw! What did you have happening to your knee?
CeCe @Pink Sunshine says
That number doesn’t define you! Be it the scale or the size in the clothes. That’s what I have to keep reminding myself because I tend to let it get me down too. Sorry operation skinny had to stop! They say that weight loss is mostly diet so even if you can’t exercise there is still something you can do which hopefully will make you feel less hopeless about the situation. And maybe there are some exercises that you can mix in that won’t hurt you? Hang in there. College Hot is not out of reach!!
Lisette says
Here’s to being college hot! Thanks girl!
Tiara says
Hey Girl — Don’t worry about the size — everyone’s weight fluctuates. Don’t let the knee stop you either. Instead of operation skinny call it operation healthy living. During my last weight loss challenge I realized that no matter how much one works out it doesn’t matter if you aren’t eating clean. Once my eating was in check the pounds just started coming off. You can do it. Let me know if you need motivation in the morning to get moving… I’m up early :)
Lisette says
I learned that too! I like the ring of operation skinny, haha, but I know what you mean!
And I might just take you up on that early offer! Be ready…soon!
Kelly says
That top is absolutely beautiful!
xx
Kelly
Sparkles and Shoes
Kerry says
So sorry the number went up for you, it is always tough when injured and not being able to work out. I had 6-8 months on not being able to do much due to a vehicle accident (I was hit by a car while on my bike) and I gained a bit. I was on the Fighter Diet for a bit and it is extreme but I lost weight without working out. It is a ton of veggies and lean proteins.
Ashley says
I’ll be praying for you tomorrow!!!
Lisette says
Thank you so much, sweetheart! You have no idea how much this means to me!
Rachel says
You’ll be college hot before you get knocked up. Don’t you worry. ;) Just think how awesome it’ll be after your knee is better!
Lisette says
Thanks lady :)
Krista says
Been reading your blog for awhile and love how open you are. And I just wanted to say I’ve been where you are. I knew I wanted to do something about my weight but never got it kicks tarted before I tore my meniscus. Well, after surgery you are in physical therapy before your stitches are out and within 2 months of physical therapy and no alcohol due to all the meds, I lost 20 pounds! So keep your head up, it will get better and ur knee will be as good as new soon enough!
Lisette says
You tore your meniscus too??
My husband’s grandmother told me she didn’t even need pain meds. I guess it all depends on the severity of the tear, as she had an arthroscopic knee surgery. All that’s visible are two tiny dots from the surgery.
I’m glad to hear you’re feeling better!
Krista says
Yup I did! And I guess I’m not as tough as your husband’s grandma because I definitely needed the pain meds with the arthroscopic lol!
Amber @ Stages of Gold says
I totally get where you’re coming from here. Having something that prohibits you from reaching your weight loss goals makes it so much harder to stay motivated and encouraged. I hope that the tear isn’t bad, and that the results show your recovery will be quick and easy. Before you know it, you’ll be back in the gym and shopping for new sizes to make you feel even more confident :)
Lisette says
From your mouth to God! Thanks lady!
Meg O. says
Yikes! So sorry about the news about your knee. That really sucks, especially when it prevents you from being active. I know that can be frustrating. I hope the recovery is quick! Maybe you can start making small changes to your diet and maybe do something really low impact (did the Dr. approve swimming or yoga or anything?) so that when you are recovered, it will be an easier transition. Also, I love that leopard print shirt! I think I need one now! Headed to LOFT! (Teacher discounts there, too! HOLLAH)
Lisette says
Giirrrrrrrl. That teacher’s discount brought my bill down by like $17. Holllllaaaahhhh indeed! I love LOFT!
The recovery is so fast it’s almost nonexistent, so I can’t wait!
Mandy says
My mom tore her meniscus about two years ago just by getting in the car. She had surgery on it and now she can exercise just fine. I hope that the tear is minor and you recover quickly, I remember her talking about how painful it was! Good luck with everything!
Lisette says
I’m so relieved to hear that she can exercise well! I hope I can recover as quickly as she did! Thanks for sharing that with me! It makes me feel better!
Jeanine says
Lisette,
You look fab no matter the size! I hope your knee heals soon. As for gaining weight, I have gained about 5-6 pounds in the last eight months and it has been so hard trying to get it off my frame! However, I realise that in going a size up, it hasn’t really affected or defined “who” I am, and I almost feel happier now than I did eight months ago. However I know what you mean about the ego and the sizes, but rest assured to that in one store you are a size 4, in another size 8 and so forth. Right now I have been trying to step up on the exercise and find that as I am no longer in my 20’s (or 30’s!!) eek, it is SO hard to get this stupid 5 pounds off! So I am going through a little of the same thing.
More importantly, I do hope all goes well with your knee, (which I am sure it will) and you will be exercising you heart out soon again!!
Codi says
Great post Lisette! Be proud of who you are, no matter the size…it’s just a number! And hang in there about the knee…I have chronic shin splints so my exercise routine is always a challenge. It just takes time and you’ll figure out what you can/can’t do and then you just do what you can!
Lisa @ Sorority Life to Army Wife says
I would love to fit into my size 12 jeans again. You should focus on fixing your knee! And I’ve found several diets where you lose weight even without exercise.
Chloe says
Ugh, going to try on the size you normally wear and not being able to fit in it is THE WORST feeling in the world. And it’s even worse knowing that you can’t do anything about it! I hope that it’s nothing too major with your knee (although I guess either way surgery entails major), and that it’s able to be fixed and healed very soon!
joannerambling says
Oh how I wish I was a size 12 instead of a size 20…………………………
Patricia says
Yikes! Sending you hugs and prayers for your knee!
xoxo
Johlet says
Ahhh now I feel fat. :(
I’m also a size 12.
Hope your knee gets better!
xxx
Kim S. says
First of all, you look fabulour regardless of your jeans size!!! I know that doesn’t always make it easier when shopping though. I am in a 14 when I used to be a 6 just a few short years ago. I “enjoyed” my pregnancy and now with an almost 2 year old I am still dealing with the weight I gained from it. It happens to all of us when we get older, bodies change, metabolism changes, everything changes! But you should be proud of how you look, a 12 is not a bad number to have to buy at all…and you look awesome. I LOVE that shirt! Is it this one from the Loft? I may have to go buy it!
http://www.loft.com/leopard-spots-print-ruffle-shoulder-shell/320035?colorExplode=false&skuId=14484605&catid=cat640048&productPageType=search&defaultColor=6600
Janna says
I weigh more than I have in a long time, and I’m accepting it! As long as we are eating healthy, we should be comfortable with where we are at ;) You are a BEAUTIFUL girl, so just take care of your knee and worry about the rest later!
Lisette says
Thank you gorgeous!!! You look great though!
Lauren {at} Life.Love.Lauren says
I wanna be hot before I try. I have the same problem with my lifestyle right now. I go from scrubs at work to a loose t-shirt and shorts and I don’t realize how quickly weight is creeping up on me.
Lisette says
Here’s to us getting hot before getting knocked up!
Michael says
I can understand this. I went from a 9 in 2005 to a 16 (2009) back down to a 10 (2009) and am now back to a 12/14. I’m most comfortable at a 10 so I’m not freaking out, especially since it’s only 18 pounds. But dammit if those 18 pounds aren’t a pain to get rid of.
lauren (@pinkonthecheek) says
I am so sorry you are in pain sweetie! Thinking of you!!
Because Shanna Said So says
Girl, you are gorgeous no matter the size…I can see it through the heart and soul you put into your posts!! Hang in there and I hope your knee gets better soon! You need to get it taken care, sister!!!
Jenny Connors says
Just a couple days ago I went through what could have been a horrible shopping experience. I used to be fit and (in my opinion) pretty darn hot! Now I’m the biggest I have ever been. I went from a 10 to a 20!! I’m working on getting healthy again, but it takes so long and I have to nice clothes that fit me now. So I went to one of my favorite stores and tried on clothes in their biggest size. When I came out of the dressing room the a couple girls who work there were smiling and asking how it went. “Nothing fit me,” I said. One of them offered to bring me bigger sizes. I swallowed my pride and said “I tried your biggest sizes.” I still managed to walk out with my head up high, but it was not a fun experience.
Ayla says
Hey, i know it has been a while but i was just wondering… im 13 and i tore my medial meniscus in my right knee when i was in 2nd grade. I just got surgery to repair it. I’m wearing a brace now and the full recovery is 6 months. I wanted to know if I could ever wear skinny jeans or any kind of jeans. If you could answer this that would help a lot, thank you!
Lisette says
Ayla, you most definitely will be able to wear jeans again! I think your braces might only be temporary (I didn’t have them). As for skinny jeans, if you go to a department store where many different brands are represented, I’m sure you will be able to find the perfect pair of skinny jeans for you! I have a pair from Ann Taylor LOFT and two from EXPRESS that I absolutely love. It’s all about looking around, as not all designers make jeans exactly the same. Good luck!