This morning I sat down in a suffocating cozy waiting room for an oil change. I finished this post on my iPhone and hit publish…only to realize half of my writing disappeared. The perfectionist in me wailed. Ironic, because this post is about how perfectionism isn’t perfect. Life has a sense of humor, doesn’t it?
In order to get my oil changed fast I have to be one of the first people here…at 7:30am. Why? Because we currently live in a small town and apparently everyone uses the same shop. Also, we’re not gonna talk about how the oil’s life is down to 30%. We’re also not gonna talk about how if left up to my husband, that number will be as close to 0% as possible before the oil is changed.
We’re not gonna talk about that.
Yesterday my mind just wandered all over the place. That’s what happens when I’m brainstorming up a blog post. It’s actually similar to when I was teaching and lesson planning. The weirdest best ideas pop into your head when you’re walking through the supermarket aisles. I don’t know about you, but for me that happens in the produce section. Maybe it’s because of those hot Liquid Plumbr guys fondling arranging the cantaloupes? Anyway, the produce section got me thinking about perfectionists.
Particularly myself.
Even as a child I was a perfectionist. I needed, like NEEDED a gold star on my homework every day in the first grade. If I didn’t get a gold star, I’d be so upset. One would argue this 8-year-old was a nerd. That’s probably my husband arguing that. It never gets old for him.
I was also self-conscious. The smallest, teasing comment would make me upset…even if the person never meant any harm. In hindsight, I know now it wasn’t due to insecurity. I grew up in a loving household, but the micro-culture surrounding me wasn’t the most positive. But that’s a story for another time.
Sometimes being a perfectionist is a blessing and a curse. It’s a blessing for when I’m learning new music. It’s a curse when I’m become discouraged, because I just give up. The perfectionist in me figures, why try if I’m going to fail or circumstances are out of my control?
I’m still a perfectionist…I’m just not a Type A. I’m more like a Type B or a Type C. If you’re confused, don’t worry. I just confused myself.
So, all in all I guess I’m not a perfect perfectionist, and I’m okay with that.
Amanda says
I STILL need my gold stars!!!!!!!
Lisette says
You’re a gold star in my eyes ;)
Rachel Silski says
I am the same way..I am way OCD about the oddest things.
Katie @ Sappy & Happy says
i feel ya girlfriend! i’m totally OCD but moving in with the fiance really has changed my perspective on things… life is too short to get bent out of shape about a picture frame that needs to be 2 inches to the left to be centered… or a dining room that is basically a land of boxes for 3 months! xoxo
Lisette says
hahahah! or an office that is full of boxes for 16 months? (that’s my husband’s office so its not my responsibility!)
Katie @ Sappy & Happy says
exactly! haha
Michelle says
I’m way too OCD myself…but I’m working on it
Madi | And So I Did says
I shut down at the first sign of the possibility of not completing something perfectly. It snowballs into my whole life and I can find myself paralyzed by the fear of failing. It’s no good. I’m working on it, though. My husband would run the darned car out of oil before going to get it changed. *sigh* What am I going to do with him?!
Lisette says
HAHA! Your comment made me LOL where the husbands are concerned. Mine is the EXACT way when it comes to car care! Why???
You and I are so much alike in that respect. Eerily alike. Are you my long-lost twin?
Madi | And So I Did says
Well, it would be perfect… Since you’re brunette and I’m blonde… It would be like double teaming the world. ;) I think we should just decide that we are! Hah!
J is the one with the new car at the moment and it’s always SO dirty… I’m like why is it a pig pen in here… IT’S A NEW CAR!!! :(
Lisette says
Bahaha. Yup. Sounds like my husband!
Lisa C says
In grade school, I was obsessed with being perfect and finishing first. It got so bad that I whipped through an assignment to turn it in first and got a B on a report card for the first time in 4th grade. I about had a meltdown and had to go see the guidance counselor.
Susanne V. says
I am a perfectionist too, and I can get pretty extreme with it. But unlike you, mine is newish. It started when I was about thirteen, and now… I am a perfectionist, only at some moments I choose not to be… It uses up so much energy. So I guess I am a not so perfect perfectionist too :)
Lisa says
I’m definitely a ‘recovering perfectionist’! It’s actually difficult for me to take myself less seriously, but I’m working on it!
Amberly says
I LOVE that picture of you and your husband. And I love this post, it’s so great! hahaha, I used to be a huge perfectionist and I just don’t care anymore :P
Brooks @ Cotton & Boots says
Sometimes I feel like it’s not perfectionism, but more like having it exactly the way you need it :)
Tiffany J. says
Oh, I am definitely a paralyzed-perfectionist! Especially when it comes to writing. I can spend more time editing and rereading a post than I did actually writing it! I’m working on letting go. :)
Lisette says
Tiffanny–you nailed it on the head. I gotta stop doing that too. If I just WRITE, my thoughts flow better!
Ashli Hall says
I can so relate! I am bad about getting discouraged & just giving up too. Gotta work on that.
Rachel Murphree says
I also do my best writing in the weirdest places, like wandering through Target or in the shower. I tell my students that that’s how it works for most writers, and to start thinking about their papers early so that they can have bus stop epiphanies. :)
Lisette says
YES!
Jodie says
I really loved reading this post :) And completely relate to it!
Jo-Anne says
If I said I was a perfectionist would you believe me……………maybe………..but if you know me then you would know that was a big fat lie…………….I am a sometimes perfectionist and a some time couldn’t care less person………..which I think is a good way to be………….but come on who didn’t like gold stars and to have more of them then any other kid in the glass………..
Lisette says
Yup. Sometime’s I’m a “couldn’t care less person.” The clothes in the dryer meet that person every day.
Noor Unnahar says
Felt like I ALWAYS needed gold stars , even now when everything should be under a kinda limit ( problems of growing up) and ofcourse , best post ideas come in public places x
Noor @ Noor’s Place
Postcards from Rachel says
Yep, we’re the same. I try to be perfect all the time and that causes me to be more of a mess. I’m definitely getting better, but it’s a slow process.
Lisette says
Wait…you’re NOT perfect?!
Chelsea says
I can be totally crazy about some things, but totally lax about others. It’s like my mind can’t decide if I’m a perfectionist or particular about certain things or not, haha.
Quinn says
Totally there with you! I still struggle with not giving up when I feel like I’m already failing. If you can’t do it right, then why do it at all – I just need to strike this phrase from my life